Everybody has a feature that they find completely irresistible on the opposite, or same sex. You know, that something that has the ability to stop the wheels of your mind turning for a few moments.
My favourite feature on a girl is legs. I don’t know what it is about legs, but I just find them captivating. Especially legs that can stop traffic, and stop me from stringing together a coherent sentence.
I think my brain is built a bit like a boy’s in that respect. It’s like the sign of sexy legs can turn me from confident woman, to the female equivalent of Homer Simpson when a doughnut comes into sight. (Minus the drool of course!)
I was out with friends recently, when I saw the most amazing legs I’ve seen in a long time…
Now, the legs in question I had seen before, but never really ‘seen’ before. And now, 'things that have been seen, cannot be unseen.' Allow me to explain:
The legs belonged to a new friend; A new, completely unavailable friend. Now, clearly as a grown-up, I can control myself. I can try and not look…but being a Libran, and a lover of beautiful things, it didn’t seem too wrong to ‘appreciate’ my friend’s amazing pins. Needless to say they appeared to go on forever, and don’t even get me started on how much I love heels on a girl.
The unfolding situation reminded me of a quote from ‘Seinfeld’, which I’d like to share with you:
"Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun, you don’t stare at it. It’s too risky. You get a sense of it and look away." - Jerry Seinfeld
It’s the same with appreciating legs. You should in theory, just look for a second, and then look away. Why? Because it’s so easy to get busted!
Over the course of the evening, to avoid looking at my new friend’s legs, I tried:
Thinking about other things, talking about other things, looking everywhere else but down, and the last resort, blatantly telling myself: JUST DON’T LOOK AT HER LEGS.
After trying all of these things (repeatedly), I had a thought:
“I’ll just embrace it! I can be subtle! I can totally get away with this.”
So, when we decided to move to a new location in the room, my new, hot friend was walking ahead of me. What did I do? I LOOKED. I took in every inch of her sensational legs (and heels), and I loved it.
What I didn’t realise; while I was so delightfully distracted is that our other friend, who’d been to the bathroom had sidled up alongside me. He looked at me, followed my eyes, my eyes lead to her legs, he looked back at me, I looked sheepish.
Here’s how the conversation unfolded between him and I:
Friend: So, what have you guys been talking about?
5 seconds pass…
Me: Huh? (I look confused)
Friend: What have you guys been talking about?
Another 5 seconds pass…
Me: Uhhhhh…. Mmmm… Uhhh, the event. (Confusion persists)
Friend: What about the event?
Me: Uhhhh…That it was really good.
*At what point did my language skills decline from those of a 29 year-old year to a 7 year old? ;)
According to my friends, this phenomena has become known as one of my ‘I’m around a pretty girl and lose all ability to speak’ moments. I work in Marketing and words are my life, ‘speechless’ and I don’t often hang out together, hence why when it does happen it’s so noticeable.
I guess though, it’s not all bad. I mean, Super Heroes have weaknesses, mine just happens to be pretty girls. And there are worse things than being speechless right? At least I don’t drool, talk too much, and blatantly ogle? Here’s hoping I don’t blatantly ogle…please nudge me if I ever do.
Anyway, there is a moral to this story other than how much I love legs, and it’s a little insight into me. If you and I were out on a date, and I smile a lot, am stuck for words, and I’m clearly a bit nervous, I think you’re in. ;)
But, I’m not all about legs; eyes, smile, intelligence and sense of humour are all very important, but I’ll go into that another time.